When receiving feedback I go through what I like to call the 3 Ps: Protest, panic, potential. First I protest: No. No, you’re wrong. This is how I write it, this is how it has to be. (This ideally happens in my head only.) Then Panic - Oh, god. They’re right. They’re so right and I’ll never figure out how to fix it. Aaaargh! (Still only in my head.) And then finally Potential - Oh wait, actually … If I just do this, this and this then maybe … Yes! (This might be shared with others. 😄)
As I’ve learnt that this is my pattern, I’ve become better at floating through the stages and trusting that I’ll get to potential soon enough and then it gets fun again. (It can still be bloody hard though. 😅)
There's that famous graphical 'curve' designed to show the emotions we go through when facing change: anger, denial etc. I wonder if experiencing criticism/feedback is a little like that...
I love this so much, it's all so true! My friend Lucy talks about the 'three day sulk' - the time it takes one to go from HOW VERY DARE THEY??? to 'maybe they have a point!' FWIW - every time I am edited I get less 'I WON'T CHANGE A WORD!' and more 'Honestly, more than happy to totally rewrite it!' X
Thanks so much for writing this Jennie! You have no idea how much I needed to read something like this today. I've been locked into a complete mood-dip about my writing, thinking it's all rubbish following some feedback that I felt was negative (it's not really). It's made me think that these feelings will pass and my mood will bounce back again. It's also good to know that a published author has ups and downs.
Thank you! I'm currently in the aftermath 😅 I got my editor's notes last week, spent about half an hour thinking, these are so useful, look how she's picked up on that thing I was hoping no-one would notice, look at how the book will be better with these small changes, then I entered the aftermath pit of despair. I think it was the thought of 'opening up' the novel and all its delicately balanced parts again, the thought of aarghhh I have no idea how to do this, and the general stamina exhaustion of novel writing 😊 All that's to say, it was nice to see your post today!
I love this! So funny and relatable and yet also encouraging! Also, your editor sounds the absolute dream, I’m so glad people like that are out there in the publishing world!
Big feelings are a good thing, they make us feel alive:). Love the breakdown, I always wondered how writers go through the editing process, it‘s one of those hazy concepts with an important word at the top that everyone‘s supposed to automatically understand! And I say that as a translator!
When receiving feedback I go through what I like to call the 3 Ps: Protest, panic, potential. First I protest: No. No, you’re wrong. This is how I write it, this is how it has to be. (This ideally happens in my head only.) Then Panic - Oh, god. They’re right. They’re so right and I’ll never figure out how to fix it. Aaaargh! (Still only in my head.) And then finally Potential - Oh wait, actually … If I just do this, this and this then maybe … Yes! (This might be shared with others. 😄)
As I’ve learnt that this is my pattern, I’ve become better at floating through the stages and trusting that I’ll get to potential soon enough and then it gets fun again. (It can still be bloody hard though. 😅)
I love this! I think your rollercoaster may be a little shorter than mine - I suspect you’re more well adjusted 😂)
Haha, I very much doubt that! (I’ll report back if I ever do get an agent/publisher in the UK.) 😅
There's that famous graphical 'curve' designed to show the emotions we go through when facing change: anger, denial etc. I wonder if experiencing criticism/feedback is a little like that...
This is so refreshing. Thank you for your honesty!
I love this so much, it's all so true! My friend Lucy talks about the 'three day sulk' - the time it takes one to go from HOW VERY DARE THEY??? to 'maybe they have a point!' FWIW - every time I am edited I get less 'I WON'T CHANGE A WORD!' and more 'Honestly, more than happy to totally rewrite it!' X
YESSSSS! am so stealing the three day sulk!
Thanks so much for writing this Jennie! You have no idea how much I needed to read something like this today. I've been locked into a complete mood-dip about my writing, thinking it's all rubbish following some feedback that I felt was negative (it's not really). It's made me think that these feelings will pass and my mood will bounce back again. It's also good to know that a published author has ups and downs.
Oh my GOODNESS I have more ups and downs than I could possibly write Substack about! Keep going Melanie x
You too Jennie! You’re doing amazing things!
Thank you! I'm currently in the aftermath 😅 I got my editor's notes last week, spent about half an hour thinking, these are so useful, look how she's picked up on that thing I was hoping no-one would notice, look at how the book will be better with these small changes, then I entered the aftermath pit of despair. I think it was the thought of 'opening up' the novel and all its delicately balanced parts again, the thought of aarghhh I have no idea how to do this, and the general stamina exhaustion of novel writing 😊 All that's to say, it was nice to see your post today!
I am in EXACTLY that place too! 😀
I love this! So funny and relatable and yet also encouraging! Also, your editor sounds the absolute dream, I’m so glad people like that are out there in the publishing world!
Big feelings are a good thing, they make us feel alive:). Love the breakdown, I always wondered how writers go through the editing process, it‘s one of those hazy concepts with an important word at the top that everyone‘s supposed to automatically understand! And I say that as a translator!